What If
by Letgoandjumpin
Summary: Story of the afterlife. When Jacob is too late to save Bella from the sweeping currents in La Push, what will Bella and Edward discover in the afterlife? And what measures would they go to, to find each other again? please rate and review!
1. Waking Up

**What if…**

_Authors note: Story of the afterlife. When Jacob is too late to save Bella from the sweeping currents in La Push, what will Bella and Edward discover in the afterlife? And what measures would they go to, to find each other again?_

please rate and review! thanx

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Bella awoke into a brightly lit room. No, not a room anymore, but a field…a growing field, with mountains in the distance, and small colorful flocks of wildflowers dotting the landscape. Edward's meadow.

She quickly propped herself up on her elbows, quizzically looking about her.

_How the hell did I end up here?_

"The same way we all end up"

Bella lurched her head to the front again, shocked by the faint voice. In front of her, was a small, petite child – a girl not 8 years old, turning over a sunflower in her hand.

"It is quite pretty here, I must say. No wonder you wanted to come back."

"Come back where?"

"Here silly!" she giggled, shoving her nose into the flower and wiggling her body back and forth. Bella rose an eyebrow at her. _Okay, I've completely lost it._

"No, you haven't." she teased, still swaying as the breeze picked up. Bella slowly stood up, circling around and gazing at the crisp bright electric blue sky scattering with a few scarce white fluffy clouds. The oaks and pines circling the meadow danced in the wind.

Suddenly images, one by one struck her hard, and she all but lost her breath as they hit her square in the chest.

_Stretching my hands towards the sky, jumping ever so slightly over the edge…falling…the wind…the torrent current…Edward's voice pleading …the water swirling and plunging me under…hitting the rock wall…my eyes flickering as the world spun before me, the water filling me up-_

She gasped, grasping her throat.

She whirled around, the little girl prancing around the flowers in the field, sniffing each one.

Bella cautiously walked towards her "did I die?" her voice sounded so foreign to her.

Lily peeked her head up, looking solemn. "I guess you could say that."

Bella stumbled back, unable to breathe. She held her head in her hands as the pressure began to well up behind her eyelids.

_Bella's POV- it keeps switching, I still haven't decided which POV I want yet_

I felt a soothing hand on my arm, stroking it softly. "Don't be sad" she cooed, looking up at me with her big blue eyes.

"W-who are you?"

"I'm Lily. I'm your guide."

"My…my guide?"

"Yes! I've been waiting for you to wake up, you didn't want to for some time but finally you did. He sent me to watch you, to help you understand."

"W-Who sent you? To understand what?"

"_He_ did silly!" she giggled playfully. She began to frolic again. I stood in a stupor, still not comprehending anything she was saying.

_Why am I…_

"Because this is your happiest memory, remember? Your happy place. It helps to make you less frightened when you arrive. I must say," she sniffed another flower "it is beautiful, more beautiful than other places I've been too. When did you come here?" she wondered thoughtfully.

I gasped.

_Edward!_

"Who is Edward?"

I turned "How do you read my thoughts?"

"I'm allowed to, I'm a messenger from _him_ remember? Your guide?"

"Okay…so, if you're my,… 'guide,' can you show me around?"

She spread her arms out wide "This is it!"

"What?!"

"This is your heaven, it's what you make of it"

_No, this can't be it_ "Where's the angels with wings and the clouds and-"

She laughed "people on earth have their own perception of heaven. Everyone has their own, and when they are ready, they can dwell in the heaven's of others."

"What do you mean?"

"Like you could visit your grandmother if you wanted, but…"

I plucked a daisy, peering at her under my lashes "but what?"

"You have to...discover yourself. And when you discover what you are capable of, then the possibilities are limitless. Especially for you."

I whirled my head on her "for me?" I repeated perturbed.

"Bella, you're special. There is a reason for everyone who exists, and he had a very _very_ special plan for you. He gave you so much, you hadn't discovered yet…because your life was ended too soon…" her eyes fell, her voice somber.

My head was whirling with so much confusion, so many questions- the reality of my death still hadn't completely sunk in yet.

"There are boundaries though, that I will explain later-"

"Why can I feel everything?" I cut in, still turning around in amazement. I walked on, brushing my hands over the tall grasses.

Lily shrugged "I guess it's just how it is"

Instantly my thoughts were gloomed over…

_This will never be my personal heaven, as wonderful as this is…_I upturned my face to the sky. I stared at the passing clouds overhead. Closing my eyes, I envisioned him before me, standing in his god-like glory…my angel, hair waving in the wind, his glorious smile shining as bright as his skin shown in the glittering sun- calling my name softly…

"Bella"

My eyes flew open and I sucked in the air.

Lily stood before me, her face in utter shock. She dropped her bouquet of flowers, inching closer to me. I looked down at her confused, still choking on sobs.

"You're…crying…" she lifted her tiny finger and wiped one of the tears from my eyelashes, observing it on her tiny forefinger.

I would have wiped the tears away. Would have stopped crying, with the reality that he did not love me any more…

But some small piece inconspicuously hidden away inside of me, hoped desperately, that he would meet me with open arms in death…and now, no matter who I met here, I was in my own personal hell without him.

"Why are you crying" she sounded hurt, slightly infuriated. This tiny child in front of me, was staring at me incredulously, as if I was the most selfish being on the planet.

"I-I'm sorry I-"

"No one has ever cried in heaven before" she uttered, mostly to herself.

"Huh?"

"What is wrong? Isn't this beautiful? Isn't this the most magnificent, comfortable place you've ever been?"

"It is beautiful" the tears began to flow freely again "but it's nothing without him"

"Him who?"

"Edward" I struggled to say the name

"Who's Edward?"

I couldn't answer her. I wiped my nose. A thought flickered-

"Lily" I asked cautiously "is it possible, to find someone-"

"In heaven? Sure!" she playfully smiled, her eyes sparkling.

"No" I hesitated "on earth."

Her smile faded.

"You're not allowed to contact with people on earth."

"But can I go down there? Like a ghost kinda?"

Lily slowly shook her head and sighed. "You all watch too many movies. Bella, you're dead! You can't go back to the life you had."

"But- but what if I just want to see someone! Not follow them around, just- see them, one last time!"

"I'm sorry, Bella. But your time was up." Her tiny high voice was filled with regret.

I fell to my knees, unable to stand any longer. Who new what insurmountable time I had here, to dwell and cry and never see him again? How could I go through forever without him?

"I'm sorry Bella, I truly am. Who was it you wanted to visit?" she bent down next to me, scanning my vacant expression.

I choked back my sobs "Edward,"

"Edward-?"

"Edward Cullen. Well, Edward Masen Cullen."

Silence.

A dark shadow from a passing cloud found me, and I was covering in a shade of darkness, the breeze picking up. The atmosphere began to change to a menacing calm, right before a storm.

"Lily?" I pushed myself up off the ground, she was no longer beside me.

She stood, teen feet away, very still, and her back towards me.

"Lily, what's wrong?" I stumbled to my feet, wiping my fresh new batch of tears as I neared her. I scanned the dark cloud covering overhead. I wrapped my arms around me "What is going on?"

She turned around so fast, her body was a blur. Her face looked up at mine, a hint of anger in her furrowed eyebrows. It was almost…frightening.

"Your moods affect your heaven, Bella. And as it turns out, if it's Edward you want to see, you will be drowning in rain for the next century at this rate."

"Why?"

"Because where Edward Cullen is, you cannot go."

_That's right, he'll live forever, with his family happily on earth without me…_I bowed my head.

"No…Edward Cullen is no longer."

"W-what?"

"What I mean is," she sighed, her eyes turning sympathetic "Edward is dead too, Bella."

As upset as I should have been to hear the news, a different feeling passed through me.

"Then…can't I see him? Is he here?!" I scanned the horizon and the trees. I almost thought I saw him glimmer between them.

"Immediately after he heard the news of your death, he committed suicide."

My eyes swept back to her in disbelief.

"No"

"In Italy."

_The volturi…_

She nodded.

"W-well, isn't he h-here?" I tentatively questioned, still looking around, expecting him to appear.

"I'm afraid not"

"What?"

"Edward, like you, is special…but in a different way. Where is he, you cannot go." she repeated again.

"But that's not fair!!" I shouted, half cried out. I felt like a child, but her words were sending me to the pits of my own hell.

"Where is he!!! Why wouldn't he be offered the same place? Why couldn't he be here with me- with the rest of us? Is…is he p-punished?" I dreaded her answer as she peered up at me.

"I can't answer you, Bella, I'm sorry."

"Please Lily PLEASE! I NEED to see him otherwise I might as well be in hell!"

Lily gazed up at the sky, sighing as the rain started to sprinkle on her heart-shaped face.

"He's a lost soul, Bella"

"No" I shook my head, my feet stepping back. "No, no"

"He was a vampire..."

"Then why did HE create them if they were to be doomed!!!" I cried out, the rain starting to pound faster. Lily looked frightened by my demeanor.

"Why!!! Why would _he_ make someone who was so good, so pure and innocent- he was innocent Lily! INNOCENT! HE NEVER MEANT TO KILL ANYONE!!! He tried so hard- he never hurt anyone…he was such a good person, why…"

Rain was pounding, flooding into the ground and spilling over it. Lily was barely visible in the wall of water, but by then I had fallen to the ground into a nightmare I had never dreamed possible. Edward, my angel…was trapped in the afterlife, as a lost soul…


	2. Horrible Truth

_Author's Note: please rate and revi_ew

_**Horrible Truth**_

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He awoke, ever so slowly. His muscles ached, and his energy was completely drained. He fell back to the ground, heaving out a breath.

_So this is what it's like to be human._

He could recall the sun, brightly shining off his skin within one second, and the next- all was black.

Carlisle was right about that part, it was certainly fast. Edward wrung his aching wrists. His body began to replenish itself instantly, and regain its strength.

Sitting up and turning around, he realized exactly where he was.

His meadow.

"Bella?" he called out, standing up. Was he really dead?

He began to run, and then his new found speed took into effect and he scanned the perimeter quickly- was he suppose to maintain his vampiric reflexes in the afterlife?

The wind was the only sound- it blew into his face, pulling back his hair and folding the tall grasses over. The sun shone brightly on his glittering skin. Where was Bella?

"Bella!" he called out.

Silence.

He scanned desperately, his breathing starting to come into a rush of gasps. "Bella!!" he shouted even louder.

Then it hit him.

What if…he was never meant to see her in the afterlife?

Edward could not contend with the thought, and he reluctantly sat upon the ground in shock.

He bowed his head, hiding his head between his needs, no tears fell, but his body shook hard.

He would never see his beautiful Bella again, but be stuck, for eternity…within his meadow…

_No, there has to be a way-_

Edward stood up, gazing at the sky in fury. He outstretched his arms, building up his anger-

"Can anybody hear me!"

The wind only blew in his response.

"I know you can hear me!" he cried out. "Why! – is this my own personal hell?!! Am I to stay here forever, for eternity, without her?" Edward furiously spat out.

Anger filled his being as his body in full speed sprinted towards the woods encompassing the meadow-

He fell back with a hard jerk, his body flying in the air and landing hard onto the ground.

The bubble he was encased in, withered and rippled slightly, before returning to normal.

Edward hastily got up, trying again. Same outcome.

He viciously attacked all sides of the meadow, growling and cursing as each time he was thwarted from leaving his encasement.

Finally he threw himself to his knees, his body wracked with sobs.

Edward was certain now of the horrible truth concerning his fate in the afterlife.

He had brought about his own doom, simply by existing as the monstrous creature he was on earth…

And now, he was completely alone and lost forever in his own torment…

He would never see his Bella again…


	3. Against All The Rules

_**Author's Note**: Please review, I really want to know your opinions!_

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**Against All The Rules**

Hours, days, weeks…Bella lay on the ground motionless and drained.

_What sort of afterlife is this?_ She thought to herself bitterly.

She had come to a conclusion.

She sat up suddenly. "Lily" she called.

The breeze only picked up and swept her hair passed her face. Then Lily was before her, appearing out of the blue.

"Hello Bella" she greeted softly.

"Lily, I want to go to the area of lost souls."

Lily cocked her head to the side, her eyes shocked. "Why Bella?" she spoke timidly. "Aren't you happy here?"

"No" Bella spoke acidly, glaring away from the petite little girl. Lily sighed heavily.

"I'm sorry Bella, but you can't go there. I won't let you."

"It's my decision!!!" Bella charged, emotion swarming in her eyes. Lily stumbled back in fright.

"I'm…sorry" Bella composed. "Just, please…if I want to go there, I should be allowed to- what's the worst that could happen?" she outstretched her hands before letting them smack her thighs.

Lily looked on in silence. Bella could see her inner debate.

"Please, Lily."

Lily sighed, closing her eyes. She shook her head. "Okay."

"Okay?!" thrill coursed through her voice.

"No one ever makes it. Usually they never make it that far. But it's your choice."

"That…far?" Bella cocked her head curiously. "Lily, what is beyond here? How do I-"

"It is for you to discover Bella, how you get there. I cannot help you with your abilities. Those you must discover yourself." Lily spoke sternly. Bella stood stunned by the coldness in the little girl's voice.

"But how do I-"

"That's for you to find out!!" Lily snapped "I'm already telling you how to get there – don't push me any more Bella, I'm going against all the rules and everything _he_ created, all because…" her voice trailed off.

Bella watched her expressions, confused. "Why?"

Lily peered up.

"Why are you doing this for me?" Bella asked softly.

Lily's eyes softened, confusion still plastered on her face "Because in all my centuries and eons here, I've never seen anyone so completely depressed and unhappy here."

She began to walk towards Bella, examining her.

"He told me you were unique…but I've never seen anyone cry in Heaven. You don't know how I feel, being so useless- there is nothing I can do to help you apparently." Lily looked away into the fields "And that's why I'm telling you. Perhaps…you'll find what you're looking for out there."

Bella nodded, waiting.

"Listen carefully Bella, I will tell you how to get there – but you must promise me something…"

"What?"

"When you get to hell, don't believe anything you see"


	4. The Seven Realms

_**Author's note**: PLEASE REVIEW!!!_

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**The Seven Realms**

Bella felt her body freeze at Lily's words.

_Hell_.

A chill ran up her spine.

"Just listen to my words-"

"I have to travel through…_hell_?!"

"Yes." Lily nodded solemnly. "And because you chose this yourself, you will not have any protection."

"Protection from what?"

"From the tortures of hell. They will be released in full fury to you- and, that's why I say that not many people have made it." Lily gulped. She could see the panic in Bella's eyes.

"I'm sorry Bella, but you chose this path."

Bella nodded unthinkingly. She refused to even imagine or think of what she was about to face.

"Now," she took a deep breath "you have to get out of here. And when you do, you must tell the guard that I sent you, and that you are free to pass through the golden gates. If he doesn't believe you, then you must tell him…that you are an _electa una of God_."

"What's an electa una?-"

Lily cut in, waving off Bella's question "Then when you pass through the gates, tell No One that you are an _electa una_, you understand? There will be consequences in the worst way if you are not careful with your title."

Bella nodded her head solemnly, all the while wondering what she was talking about.

"You will travel down a flight of stairs, and when you reach the dark wooden door, open it- you will find yourself in a hallway of doors. You must find the right door, and -"

"How will I know the right door?"

"Trust me Bella, you will know" she frowned slightly. "Then you will enter into the first level…"

"Of what?"

Lily breathed in "I have never been to these places Bella, so I will not be able to tell you what…_dwells_ there, but some call it the place of…unsightly hells…visions, of earthly horrors…but you must travel through it, till you reach the door on the other side, where it will take you to the next realm-"

"H-how many realms are there?" Bella meekly called out.

"Seven"

"_Seven_" Bella repeated in a whisper. She closed her eyes as Lily continued on.

"The second is the realm of human faults. You will see many people, in violence- in rage – repeating their faults over and over again without consciously understanding their motives."

"Why?" Bella asked horrified.

"Because it is their punishment,…and when they realize what they have done is wrong, and their conscious clears- they will only escalate to the level of unsightly hells to watch the world suffer as they have made suffer."

"That's horrible…why would…_he_ do this?"

"Well, you have to put souls somewhere, even the bad ones. Why not help them learn their lesson in hell?"

"T-true…"

"It's not what you think" Lily started to smile "you think they are stuck there, but they aren't. Eventually _He_ recognizes the good in their heart, the clearance of their conscience, and they are given their own domain in the afterlife- their own heaven. He realizes that people change, Bella, the world is not set in stone, but seasons."

Bella nodded understandingly.

"When you find the door at the end, you will enter into the third realm– that of the damnation of the damned."

"Damnation of the damned?"

"He has created more than humans, but earthly folk do not see them, although they live amongst them."

"I don't understand"

"I think you do" Lily nodded "Those who have taken the dark track when given a test upon their conscience, such as Laurent, Victoria, and James as you recall?"

Bella gasped. Her mind instantly flashed to James' menacing red eyes.

"But vampires aren't the only, what humans call 'mythical' creatures there. Take care, Bella, do not let them woo you in."

Bella nodded feverishly.

"Now comes the harder parts. When you reach yet again the door at the end, for there will _always_ be a door at the end, you must look inside yourself Bella and find it. Find it and latch on to it, and do not let the noises get to you. Do not let it fade, or you will be taken by the darkness. No matter what, when you finally reach that door, keep it with you when you pass, because when you reach the fifth realm…you will experience pain."

"Lily, what is it I have to find?" Bella's voice was now shaking.

"I don't know exactly" Lily screwed up her face, biting her lower lip. She looked much older than Bella gave her credit for.

"So, the fourth realm is…"

"Darkness"

"And the fifth realm is-"

"Pain" Lily finished.

"What, kind of pain?"

"I don't know Bella, I can't help you there. But I do know that the 6th realm is probably the most dangerous"

"Why?"

"Because that is the one most don't survive through, because they so easily believe what they are told."

"W-what is in the 6th realm?"

"It's called the Plague Upon the Mind, you will see things that are personal to you- people, memories, experiences, and even fears – and everything will be skewed and distorted to make you believed they are your reality. They will trick you to pull you in – don't let them Bella, get away as fast as you can. Because even though you will start to believe that everything around you is real, once you do, your visions can harm you in any way. But after you pass through that door, you'll be safe, I think."

"You think?" Bella gawked.

"Well, I've never exactly heard of anyone going past the 6th door into the 7th realm. But I'm sure you'll find your way to what you're looking for if you make it." Lily stepped foreword, taking Bella's hands and staring deep into her eyes.

"I hope, that what you are looking for, is worth all of this. You are about to embark on a journey that will test, break, and hurt you, both physically and mentally. Is it worth it, Bella? Is it worth risking your own soul, passing through hell and its treacheries, and most likely losing yourself in the process?"

Bella didn't even have to think as she let out a breath "It's worth it"

Edward's face flickered into her head. _I'm in hell without him…_

Lily grinned, wrapping her petite arms around Bella's lower half. "Take care Bella. Even though I don't know _He_ would approve of this, He apparently had chosen you for a remarkable destiny on earth" she released her arms

"I just hope he stays with you during your journey in the afterlife"

And when Bella blinked again, Lily was gone.


	5. Michael

Author's Note: Please Review!

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**Michael**

Bella sat in the Indian position on the ground, staring into space as the wind wiped through her hair.

She had finally accepted the fact that she was going to travel through the seven realms of hell…

_But how to get out of here?_

She sighed, closing her eyes.

All she could think of, was Edward…his arms around her, his fingers tracing her jaw, his crooked smile-

_Poor Charlie, Poor Renee._

Tears escaped their barrier and she was once again lying on the ground floor.

_If I could only see them once more- I can imagine Renee going out of her mind, and Charlie, oh God poor Charlie is all alone now…at least Renee has Phil…and Jacob, I'm going to miss him…they're probably better off without me though, otherwise I could have led Victoria right to them…_

Her body was yanked up- a wooshing sounded in her ears. When she opened her eyes in panic- she was surrounded in white. A tall, handsome guy stood at a pair of golden gates. Bella stumbled to her feet.

_H-how the heck did I get here?!_

He stood like a god himself, his wavy blonde hair hung over his eyes and down to his shoulders. His piercing blue eyes looked straight at me in curiosity.

"um, excuse me, but are you- ?"

"Michael" he held out his hand and smiled. She shook it. "Hi, Mike, um…could I, pass through those gates?"

"You could," he cocked his head and grinned "doesn't mean I'll let you"

"But Lily said I could" Bella edged.

Michael furrowed his brow, his face calculating.

"What did Lily say?" he edged further.

"She said…um," _what were the words_ "that I am an _electa_…_una_ I think?"

His eyes widened and he shifted in his position. He closed his eyes and tilted his head.

Suddenly the gates popped open.

"You're free to go" Michael maintained his stone-cold stare again, resuming his stance.

"Um, Mike?"

"Yes?" he looked down, probably hopeful I had changed my mind.

"If I come back up here, up those steps I mean, could I re-enter the gates?"

Michael stared for a long time into my eyes. "I don't think you'll get this far, Bella."

_WTF? How does he know my name?_

He smiled crookedly. "Is that a problem? Maybe you should rethink your decision."

Bella felt her chest constrict. She stared straight ahead at the long twisted flight of white steps ahead of her. She closed her eyes and started to listen to the silence…those topaz eyes…

_An eternity with Edward as a lost soul, is better than any heaven…_

"That's okay. If…if I stay, I might as well be in hell anyway." she breathed. Michael stiffened, looking at her peculiarly before straightening back up. He kept his eyes on her.

"Are you really that unhappy?" he furrowed his perfect glowing brow into a frown.

_Even you, an angel, are no match for Edward's beauty_ she thought with a hidden grin.

She nodded solemnly.

"What is it?" he questioned, still extremely curious. "I've,…never heard of someone so unhappy who's been given everything."

Bella shook my head. "I'm missing my heart" she looked straight into his crystal blue eyes. Realization dawned upon his face, and he solemnly nodded.

"I wish you luck, Bella Swan. May you find your heart again. May He be with you."

Those were his final words as she stepped through the gate.

_I hope He's with me too._


	6. The Red Apple

_**Author's Note**: Please Review!_

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**The Red Apple**

_Damn these steps_!! Bella cursed internally as she raced down the endless flight.

_What is this, punishment for wanting to travel to hell?_

She saw the door far down before her- a pure white door with gold-leaf trimmings on its edges.

Her hand held onto the stiff doorknob. _Okay, you can do this._

She opened the door without so much as a nudge, and she was instantly standing in a white hall filled with numerous doors.

Wasting no time, Bella began to scan the doors for some sign. She was afraid to peek into any one door, afraid of what may lay behind it.

They bore various signs, most had stars, but others had odd shaped circles, some with rings around them, some oddly colored- some with other circles position in odd places.

Her eyes flashed back to the door she had just passed.

_No, that can't be-_

She stood in front of the door for an insurmountable amount of time, staring at the beauty of the orb in front of her, rotating crookedly, the swirling white starting to blend over the blues, greens, browns, and yellows of the small orb. Another gray orb was slowly making its way about the larger one, as if watching it at all angles, protecting it somehow.

Tears formulated behind her eyes.

She reached out with a shaky hand towards the door. Her home beckoned to her, it was just beyond that door, just beyond her reach…

Topaz eyes flooded her vision.

Her hand retracted immediately into a clutch, and without so much as another glance she shot off down the hall.

Her feet were bringing her into a jog as her eyes scanned the countless doors covered in various planets and glimmering balls of gaseous stars.

Her breath hitched-

Everything instantly froze, and chills spread through her body instantly. Moving cautiously, Bella turning to her left…

It was a white door like the others, but it had a black doorknob unlike the common white. On the door, instead of a planet, star, galaxy or other creation…was a simple, red apple.

Bella reached up tentatively and let her fingers trace the apple.

She bowed her head, composing her breath. _I'm coming Edward…_

And with that, she opened the door.


	7. Time is Running Out

Author's Note: Sorry for the wait- and I know this is a really crummy written chapter, I'll try and make them better. Please review- I really like them!

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**Time is Running Out**

Upon passing through the door, Bella could hear distinct cries growing closer instead of far away. She turned back to the door quickly, tugging on the handle- but it wouldn't budge.

_Okay…breathe Bella, breathe…_

"Please help me" a meek voice pleaded behind her.

Bella whirled around-

Everything had changed. Before her stood a small girl holding a teddy bear to her chest, the entire left side of her body brown and black, disfigured, crusted, and burnt. Bella blinked, her eyes not believing what she was seeing- but the girl was gone, and before her was the protected white path.

Breathing heavily in fright, Bella started foreword, her eyes completely open to the horrors about her.

Screams from children, women and men pierced through her ears, into her memory. A massive boat to her left was sinking into the water ever so slowly, the lights in the cabins flickering- children screaming for their mothers and crying on the balconies- then falling into the water, never to resurface…a fire was raging to her right, destroying a building. A woman's shrieks could be heard within,…figures ablaze were running from the house…

Every time she blinked the images would change-

And every time, another tear would fall…

Buildings were collapsing, people drowning, freezing, burning alive- She wanted so badly to reach out and rescue the children from the shootings of various African tribes that were rioting one another- or protect the lonely girl from the rapist in the alley – or pull the old woman from the rubble and save her from the cracks of an earthquake before she fell through.

_Stop, make it stop_ Bella shut her eyes. _Oh I need you Edward_ she wrapped her arms around herself, only looking at the white paved way before her…until suddenly it was splotted with blood.

She looked up, gasping. A family of six were hung, two of them had been cut severely over the throat. A devilish crowd of people with torches were cheering.

Bella held her mouth, her head spinning. She was sure as she lurched that she was going to be sick, but she closed her eyes again…lingering and holding on to one thought…

_His arms wrapped around her, his forehead touching her own…his cool lips traced upon the corners of her jaw, until they reached her mouth and she couldn't contain herself any longer…_

The ground shifted beneath her suddenly and she lurched foreword to catch herself, her eyes bursting open.

Everything about her, the torture, the severed limbs scattered upon the ground covered in gore, were replaced with pure brilliant white and a black door lay before her expectantly. Her only way out, her only way to him.

Desperate to cling to the memory that had fallen away, she let Lily's words echo in her ears as she reached out with a shaky hand for the knob, not knowing what lay behind it…what lay awaiting for her…

Holding her breath, she opened the door-

Terrifying screams pierced her ears and her body was thrust foreword into, what seemed to be, a scene from a horror movie. She was standing in the middle of an abandoned city, buildings dilapidated, windows broken, papers scattered and blowing about the ground. Everything was in shades of gray.

"H-hello?" she called out tentatively. There was no answer, just silence. Holding her breath she started to walk along the dirt path of the wide alley.

As soon as she starting walking, her entire scene shifted and changed. Bella faltered back, catching herself when a woman in her young twenties came tearing through down the alley towards her.

"HELP!! FOR GOD'S SAKE HELP!!!"

Suddenly, she fell, and Bella saw the man standing right behind her, a machete in his hand as he headed slowly towards her. She started to crawl backwards.

"Oh my God, oh my God" Bella kept repeating to herself as she watched this masked figure, clothes stained in blood, start walking towards the helpless woman.

"PLEASE HELP ME!!!" the woman screeched. Bella's legs were moving before she noticed she had consciously began to run. She reached for the woman's hand to help her up-

The woman screamed in terror as Bella's hand went right through hers.

Bella stood confounded at the spot as the woman continued to try and hold Bella's hand, but to no avail, she was transparent.

Bella slowly looked up when the screaming became more horrific. The woman was reaching her hands out to Bella with pleading eyes and streaming tears as the murderer started to drag her away by her legs. Bella couldn't find a breath. She watched in horror as he stopped, and rose his machete into the air. She turned away just in time before she heard the sickening crunch from the contact of the weapon into the woman. But it didn't end. It was crunch, after crunch, after crunch…

With hands over her ears and eyes shut tightly, Bella tried to walk on, past the scene, hoping that the man couldn't hear her through his hacking fest.

_Happy thoughts, happy thoughts…_

_He should kill me too, I couldn't even save that woman_

Tears were choking her breathing.

She released her ears and opened her eyes wider when she came to a clearing, and noticed that the noise had stopped. She peered behind her, and watched in horror as the remains of the woman were being dragged away down a side alley.

"Oh God, please God" Bella tried to compose her breathing.

At turning around, Bella scanned the horizon. She could see other figures as clearly, everywhere, chasing people- grabbing at them- she didn't want to know what they were doing…but there, in the distance, was her door.

Feeling a jolt of hope pass through her, she started forward, ignoring the people around her- the crying, sobbing, raping- pleading for help- all the while, tears cascaded down her cheeks, her lips trembling as she realized she was leaving these people for dead.

_They're not real, they're just a figment of my imagination…_

Suddenly she felt eyes upon her. Scanning the broken shops and windows, her entire body froze when her eyes met his steal, cold black ones. He was standing, behind a smashed window, looking straight at her.

Bella's heart began to palpitate faster as the figure began to move.

_Oh crap- this can't be happening- I thought I was safe! _

Her clumsy legs tripped over themselves as she tried to run. Scrambling she kept her eyes locked on her escape before her.

His hand wrapped around her mouth and dragged her down immediately before she could reach for the knob. Her voice broke against the black glove, and out of the corner of her vision she could see the small silver blade turning over and over in his other hand. Her chest swelled with fear, and her voice struggled against his as her hands tried to tear the hands off of her. He began to drag her farther and farther away from the door.

In moments she was on her back, the blade to her neck.

There was nothing in his eyes, which is what scared her the most.

He began to undo his pants-

"NO!!!!!" Bella shrieked, kicking and flailing. Her words suddenly choked-

The blade had pierced into her neck, and there was a furious look on his face. Her head spinning, she could feel his hands tugging at her clothes.

"Time is already running out" he spoke coldly, his eyes bearing into hers with a black, icy stare.

"W-what?" she wriggled, trying to be free.

"You're precious Edward cannot save you now...he'll be gone before you reach him" a sick, twisted smile played upon his lips.

"No, that can't happen" she shut her eyes, her breathing escalating as his hands roamed her jeans.

_Happy thoughts, happy_ _thoughts_ the saltiness of her sobs stung her face.

_She was back in her bedroom, Edward was sitting in the rocking chair._

"_Edward, you stayed!"_

"_Of course I stayed" he smiled crookedly as she leaped into his lap._

"Edward" she called out meekly as her pants became unzipped.

A wild high-pitched rushing, like the sound of a train, began to barrel through the abandoned city. Bella watched with blurry eyes as a tornado of wind began to pass through the main alley and sweep everything aside.

_Oh shit, oh shit-_

Her attacker stalled, and immediately began to sprint to the other end in fear. Bella only had time enough to shield her eyes before she expected the impact-

But the impact never came. She was knocked down by the wind, but wasn't slammed into any buildings. Opening her eyes slowly, still shielding her face, she saw the door outlined by the walls of wind. Stumbling up, she adjusted her pants before limping to the door. In the dark wind the outlines of people could be seen- prevented from attacking her.

Finally reaching the door, she tugged at the knob, thrust it open, and fell into the other realm.


	8. Bite Me

_**Author's Note: Trying to crank these out, I wanted to put all the characters I had thought up into this chapter- but there were too many and Bella would be stuck here forever...lol...**_

**_Please Review! And thank you to all those who did!_**

_**

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_**Bite Me**_

The images of the horrors she had just encountered were still fresh in her head. She knew that those black eyes of her attacker would haunt her for as long as she lived.

_I'm running out of time?_ Bella thought uneasily. _Lily never mentioned that I was limited on time…_Bella could only wonder what that meant. Was he trying to scare her? Wasn't that the whole purpose of hell? Or was it so frightening, because it was the truth?

The road lay before her- the only source of light in the empty, black space.

Her throat went dry as she stepped foreword, letting her hand leave the door.

The sudden slam of the door behind her made her jump and look back. The door was gone.

A gust of wind blew her hair, and she flew around only to see the dark figure quickly cross the path into darkness.

_You're just dreaming Bella, it's nothing- just go_

"Don't be frightened"

Bella whirled around, but the source of the words was no where.

She started to walk faster.

"Where are you going?" another more enchanting voice piped in.

Bella couldn't help but stop. Her head was starting to feel fuzzy at the words.

"Are you afraid of us?"

A woman not over 21 stood before her, more beautiful than Rosalie, more beautiful than any woman she had seen. Her wavy blonde hair reached down to the middle of her back, her slender pale body was covered by a silky white dress…her eyes were piercing emerald green.

"U-um," Bella's voice was caught in her throat. A goddess stood in her way, and for some unknown reason, Bella was unable to remember why she was there in the first place.

"Oh silly Bella"

A brilliant red head, also with bright glowing green eyes stood not a few feet from her left, her pale skin glowing in the darkness. She too was decked in a white silk dress.

"Do you honestly want to leave us?" she cocked her head to the side, her eyes speaking to her.

"Leave all of this?" a deeper, richer voice added in. To her right, another pale, tall goddess with pitch black raven hair that fell stick straight against her back, stood in all her glowing glory. Her jaw line and features were more severe, but her entire essence oozed of grace, elegance, and a deadly entity that pierced Bella's chest.

A brilliant torch flickered up ahead- and within seconds an entire hallway resembling that of an ancient castle was lit with the glow of red and orange torches and chandeliers. The three goddesses were gone.

"Come with us Bella" the voice giggled. Bella turned her head and watched the white silk and bare perfect dainty feet disappear around the corner. Without thinking, her feet acted upon her command.

The walls were bare except for the stone, but there was something oddly comforting by the way the light hit the tapestries, causing them to cast a hazy glow into the air.

"Bella, this way! Come with us…" the voice beckoned.

Bella whirled about the corner and traveled further into the halls. Everything began to smell stronger and more pungent- she could almost taste the floral perfumes in the air.

She was being led into a dimly lit room filled with hundreds of assorted pillows piled in the center, candles burning softly in the background, the window beyond opened to a balcony of darkness, the transparent curtains blowing in the soft wind.

"Come sit with us Bella" the voice spoke behind her. Bella gasped, whirling around at the noise.

All three stood before her, smiling benevolently. The blonde gently pushed her back, and Bella's body fell softly onto the pillows.

"We've been dying to meet you…" the red head began to play with Bella's hair.

_When did she move next to me?_ Bella panicked. But soon her thoughts were washed away until her brain was but a stupor. She only remembered this feeling when she was around Jasper.

"Oh Bella, pretty Bella," the raven haired sat above her, watching intently. "Don't worry, we won't hurt you…much" her teeth glimmered in the dim light and Bella gasped.

Bella wretched herself up, but the Blonde's small hand prevented her from moving any further. She had positioned herself to tower above her, preventing her escape.

"No…please…" Bella spoke meekly, unable to register her thoughts completely.

"Driselda" the raven haired look at the blonde angrily. The blonde named Driselda latched her eyes onto Bella's.

Bella's head fell back as a huge wave of serenity filled her mind until she was nothing but a vegetable, lying on the pillows, her eyes barely able to make out the blurry images before her.

"Would you like the first bite, Patricia?" Driselda spoke musically.

"I would love to, as long as Narcissa does not mind" her higher voice lurched Bella further from her stupor.

"Of course, sister, I do not mind…" she smiled brilliantly above, scanning Bella's expression with her green eyes.

"A-are…y-you v-vamp-pires?" Bella managed to mutter deliriously.

All three laughed musically.

"Why yes, silly Bella, we are, and we aren't the only ones…but we are more than vampires…"

"We're enchantresses" the redhead added.

"cursed for eternity to dwell here, because of our special powers"

"Should we tell her our story sisters?"

"A tidbit perhaps. Narcissa?" Driselda looked at her sister with a slight grin.

"You see Bella," the raven haired named Narcissa stroked her face, and Bella's eyes flickered as a numbing sensation took over her body. "In our past life, we were gifted witches, able to enchant men and beautiful virgins likes yourself so that we could retain our beauty by using them in our elixirs…"

"But we have not seen anyone for weeks now, and we are quite thirsty you see"

"We've been cursed to die of thirst for eternity,"

"But beautiful Bella, you are going to quench us and make us better"

"Temporarily" the other corrected

"Perhaps, but it would be so wonderful to taste virgin flesh again…" Driselda's eyes flickered with greed as she drew closer to Bella's face.

"No, Driselda. Patricia is first"

Driselda drew back "but she _smells_ so _good_" she complained, wrinkling her nose.

"Okay Bella, you can close your eyes now, you won't feel a thing" there was a hint of mockery in her voice.

Bella shut her eyes tight, her heart palpitating so fast in her paralyzed state, that she was sure it would burst through her chest.

_Oh Edward, please- I'm so sorry_- her heart swelled. _I love you so much, I wish I could see you again…_

"You stupid girl!!" the ugly voice hissed.

Bella's eyes flew open. The candles had gone completely out and the room was cast in shades of blue. Her paleness seemed to have a particular hazy glow in the darkness.

"She's an electa una Narcissa!" Driselda gasped. Bella noticed then, that all three had backed away from her, and were spaced up above her against the corners of the room.

Her breath hitching, finding no time to waste, she sprinted from the room, her hands pushing against the wall when she rounded the corners. She tripped over her own feet, but kept running. The screeches of the three enchantresses were coming closer behind her. She rounded a corner and froze- a hooded black figure, completely obscured from her view was jerking across the hall. At the slightest halting of her breath, the black figure turned to her immediately- and started to make its way toward her. She shot off in the other direction down the hall to her right.

_Oh please, oh please _Bella begged within her mind, shutting her eyes temporarily.

She raced the corner and down the large flight of stairs, the large doors were in her reach.

"So, Bella Swan" there was a dark chuckled above her. Bella froze, covering her head in reaction.

"No Edward to save you this time?"

"James" Bella's breath hitched.

"Do you know what lurks here? Besides me?" James cocked his head, grinning, blocking her only way out. "You're very lucky you only found the enchantresses…but so unlucky, that you have found me…for I'm not playing any games this time"

James lip curled to reveal his brilliant teeth, he crouched into a stance. "Do you know what it's like, to be eternally thirsty?" he growled.

Bella grappled for anything to hold on to, any weapon- anything at all, but all she found was air behind her. Her breath quickened as he crouched, readying himself to pounce.

She did the only thing she could do, she ran- ran so fast her legs were burning. But James was perched on the steps within seconds, and Bella had to turn around and race towards another hall- but he was there again.

"You're an idiot," he snarled. He flew at her, sending her mid-air and smacking her up against a wall. Bella's head jolted, her spine tingling when she contacted with the stone wall.

"for ever falling for a vampire" he finished with a grimace.

Bella's eyes narrowed, "no," she responded, her eyes starting to soften in defeat "I fell in love with an angel"

"an _angel_?" James mocked in amusement. He slammed her wrists above her head. Bella let out a high yelp, turning her head away. James grabbed her face and pulled it towards his.

"You are disgusting" he spat, his face twisting upward "You would have been too late anyways, Bella"

"Bite me" Bella shot at him in anger immediately. "Damnit James, bite me!" she screamed in earnest.

James looked at her peculiarly. "You want me to _bite_ you?" he looked over her neck, his eyes flashing with thirst at the red cut that had dried over.

"Yes, because the sooner you bite me- the sooner I become a vampire- the sooner I can be with Edward" Bella stated matter-o-factly.

James grinned maliciously "That's what you think"

Bella's expression sunk as James closed the gap.

"What the-" James exclaimed, his voice miles away.

Bella felt herself crash onto the floor. She looked up, James was thrown to the ground, like the enchantresses had been.

_What is going on?_

James charged once more- but was knocked down by an invisible force. He screamed, his teeth snapping and eyes glowing bright red. Bella scrambled on her hands and knees, and unlatched the door, quickly scrambling into the darkness.


	9. A Million Hands

_Author's Note_: _Please review!! (I really enjoy them)_

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**_A Million Hands_**

Bella struggled to shut the wind out, her back pressing against the door. Even with the small crack of light, Bella could see nothing before her but pitch black.

_Here it goes…_the door slammed shut with a final push of her muscles.

For an entire minute lying against the door, all she heard was her own breathing. Her eyes strained in the darkness – but no outlines or shapes could be identified.

Taking a cautionary step foreword, she barely lost her balance. Slowly she started, step, after step-

Hot breath blew upon the back of her neck.

Bella gasped, whirling around- but she could hear nothing but the increasing rate of her heartbeat. Chills ran up her spine, knowing that source of her terror could be blindly staring at her, inches from her face, and she would have no idea. She hugged her arms about her.

She started again, trying to find her bearings.

_Wait- was this the way I was going? Am I going straight?_

Bella turned right, unsure of where she was headed, or headed into.

_Shit_

A low growl emitted in front of her. A deep, rumbling growl more terrifying than Emmett's.

Bella stopped, waiting till the growling ceased. She closed her eyes (though it made little difference) and waited for the lightheadedness to pass her.

Something sharp was tracing along her bare arm, up…tickling…cutting in deeper when it reached her shirt…further…to her neck…

Her entire body trembled as the panic set in. No nightmare could compare to the anxiety overwhelming her now. Without warning from her own body, she was sprinting into the darkness away from the creature. She could hear it chasing behind her, its growls coming closer. Something was touching her on all sides, scanning her body,…a million hands, grabbing her shirt, ripping her right sleeve- freezing hands still grabbing and reaching for her, pushing her till she was caught between the walls of hands scanning her body.

Screaming, they started tugging at her hair, pulling the thin strands until a few broke from the seams and left her crying in pain.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" her voice broke under the strain. They continued to pull and tug at her, and she struggled to move foreword as they latched like leeches onto her body.

Bella reached out into the darkness, her breath still the only sound in her ears. Her hands reached for anything to stabilize her body and pull her from the deadly pit.

Then she felt the cold of stone, and hoisted herself up into the embrace of the stone.

Finally the hands disappeared into solid, sound walls. She continued to inch her way through, hitting the walls as she went- inching her way through small opening- until she was stuck between them…

Covering her head with her hands, she engrossed her eyes into the visions of her past in solace…awaiting them to get her-

_She was six, holding onto her worn teddy bear. She clasped onto her mother's hand tightly. More than ever she felt so alone and lost, watching the suitcases pass by her, the loudspeaker radiating the soothing sound of a woman's voice, like the hospital she had been to so many times when she was young._

"_Alright honey, now don't leave the stewardess' side, okay?" Bella was eye to with her mother. Her eyes were all glassy._

"_This is the first time mommy isn't going to go see daddy with you. You're going to be okay Bella" she forced a smile "You've always been mommy's big girl"_

_Bella clutched Renee as they embraced, her face blank- her mind racing. Where am I going?_

"_Say hi to daddy for me Bella" Renee waved. Bella watching her mother silently as she was being towed by the young stewardess onto the plane._

Why that memory burdened her retina now, she had not the slightest idea.

Was it because she was feeling as equally lost? Because she had abandoned Renee and Charlie when she leapt off the cliffs?

Silently bowing her head, guilt overrode her body. _How could I have left them so quickly without a goodbye- without making sure they were alright? Renee will have Phil, she'll be alright…but poor Charlie…_

She silently rocked herself back and forth in the darkness, half expecting to be tortured by the unseen monsters within the next second. But as her head hit the back of the wall, it jabbed against something protruding from it. Bella froze, and cautiously lifted her shaky hand.

A wooden knob.


	10. Overboard

_**Author's Note**: Having a little trouble with writers block right now since the chapter after this is one of the more important ones, sorry if there is a delay._

_Please keep reviewing:)_

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_**Overboard**_

Up against the door, panting for breath, Bella's hair was stuck to her mouth and face, her eyes wild with fear. Her brain took in the surroundings about her.

The white door was not 20 feet from her, the walls on all four sides christened in vivid blood-red, striped with a single broad length of white across the floor, leading up to the matching exit.

Scanning the premises, she laid against the wall, composing her breath and waiting for something to pop out- some damned creature, some murderer, some horrific scene to emerge, all to spoil the peace within her that very moment.

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[Edward POV

The grass no longer felt wonderful against my skin…I could barely feel anything anymore.

What was the use of existing? Especially in this place, when my Bella was not with me?

_I was dead before I even ended up here._

The sky never changed. I probably had been here for days, maybe even weeks. I don't know how I even lasted this long.

I closed my eyes, breathing in the scent of Bella from my memory – still fresh and potent to my senses. I may have imagined it, but her scent was wafting in the air every time the wind would blow.

Here, I was no longer thirsting for her, but dying to be near her, as a man. It was literally killing me.

I shot up as the memory brought pain to every part of my body.

"I THOUGHT THIS WAS HEAVEN!!!" I cried out to the sky with outstretched arms. "WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME WITH NO ULTIMATUM!! NO WAY TO STOP THIS PAIN!!!"

I waited in silence, breathing heavily. The sky twisted and furled into dark gray clouds quickly. I watched, aghast, while small patters of rain began to pelt upon my pale skin, falling down my eyes and cheeks, soaking my hair to my face.

I heard it before I saw it. The hard pang against the ground not a few meters before me.

Gently treading upon the softening earth, I lifted the small dagger, sheathed with a red silk ribbon at the end, already frayed, withered, and worn.

Still unable to think, I stared up- waiting for a reply besides the method of further torture I was given. Collapsing to the ground in sobs, I let the rain fall over me until it no longer was pelting against my skin, but into me- pushing thoughts into my head – burning me inside instead of cooling the sweltering unquenchable fire in my heart. _Was this how it was supposed to end? What if I didn't disappear with the strike of a dagger- what if I were to lie here eternally in misery and pain?_

A different voice, my own, broke the barrier and spoke into the rain, answering my own mind.

"It wouldn't matter, I'm in more pain now than I ever will be…" and with that, my head fell overboard, gradually plummeting deeper and deeper- not even struggling to keep afloat anymore…and I closed my eyes, letting myself drown in the icy depths.

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Bella fell on her knees. The door was right in front of her, but she couldn't even extend her arm. It felt like a fire had spread through her veins and was burning her through. It was like…she had been bitten by a vampire…

She had only taken one step, one – not even five feet, when every painful memory collapsed into her cerebellum and was cutting her from the inside through. Every memorable injury, was slowly coming to a surface…

She arched her back in agony when suddenly her lungs were closed- filled with water-

_Swim Bella Swim!_

Memories swirled into vision, the rapid pulsing of her veins renewing themselves.

_Swim damnit!_ Edward's voice boomed in her ears.

The burning in her limbs and the intense ache in her body was unbearable.

Red dots followed her as she crawled on hands and knees on the short white walk. A serrated pain pinched at the core of her abdomen. Sucking in air, she collapsed onto the blinding white. Turning onto her back, red overtook her vision.

It seemed the longer she lay within the room, the more sufferable the needle-sharp panging in her body became.

How could she reach the door when she couldn't move?

Reaching her hand to her blurry vision, she could see the crimson painted upon her hands. The source of the splatters.

_What?...I've never…hurt myself…there…_ the wound right through her stomach was by far the worst she had ever experienced.

Suddenly a tough, thick ripping tore through her leg, and she instinctly arched her back in a deathly scream, grappling for her leg.

Her right leg was immobile – practically severed from her hip.

Watching in blurred stupor, she turned onto her stomach.

"AH!" Bella cried out in pain as she dragged her leg with her. Within seconds, her right wrist snapped foreword without warning.

"AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

Cradling her hand into her chest, Bella refused to believe she was bleeding or in pain- despite her lack of vision or breath. Inching foreword painfully slow, the door was just in reach-

Bella jolted, eyes empty. A blast of burning fire coursed through her. Her face stung with the wetness of her sobs. The hole in her stomach was nothing compared to the hole in her heart, but Bella refused to let her misery get ahold of her. The raging fire of vampire poison spread to the tips of her phalanges, up to her eyes. Piercing screams ravaged her sore throat before her body collapsed onto the blood-soaked ground…

_Just let me die…please, just let me die!..._

A sanguine liquid slowly started to fill her mouth.

_Edward! Remember Edward!_

But all her memories were burned from her- buried so far deep beneath the pain, she wasn't sure if she could resurface herself.

_Keep breathing Bella _he spoke gently_ Just keep breathing…don't give up on me now Bella…_

Her shaking hand reached for the handle –

When her fingers touched the knob, the door opened- her lifeless body was wretched into the other realm, tumbling, falling, and sliding down a large hill.

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Please Review!!!


	11. Claimed

_Author's Note: I know some people don't understand this story- I have a very wierd mind. But I hope some things clear up in this chapter. Please review!! Thank you so much to those who have otherwise I wouldn't have posted so soon!!_

_XOXO _

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**Claimed**

Her hands clutched the soft grass beneath her, her eyes wincing at remembering the past pain.

Bella startled. Immediately upon looking down at herself, she observed that her body was intact- no blood, no severed limbs- no pain- not even a reminder of a stain upon her clothes of her hellish encounter from the past realm. She was unscathed.

Uneasily coming to her feet, she stood with a gaping mouth, taking in the environment about her.

_No way…_

Behind her, was the cliff, and in front of her in the distance, was Billy's house with her colossal red truck sitting expectantly in the driveway.

No longer cautious she darted foreword towards the truck, tripping and falling along the way. Jumping into her seat and slamming the door, she turned the ignition and rapidly started to back out of the gravel driveway.

_C'mon truck_! Bella seethed, pushing 65, the highest her truck would go.

Finally after what felt like hours, she had arrived.

Racing and tripping from the massive ancient vehicle, she sprinted towards her house.

"DAD!" she screamed, panting.

The door opened-

Bella froze.

"Bella, honey!" Renee threw herself into a hug. Bella forgot how to breathe.

"M-mom? W-what are you d-doing here? At Dad's?"

"Oh, well, I just wanted to visit you honey! Is something wrong? Why are you home so early, I thought you were out with Jacob?"

"N-no mom, I wasn't I-" Bella watched as Charlie came up beside Renee, wrapping a tender arm about her shoulders. Bella's brow furrowed.

"This isn't real" she shook her head, backing away.

"Bella, what are you talking about?" Renee quizzically turned her head.

"Bells, are you alright?" Charlie asked, slightly perturbed.

"Why don't you go find Mike and Angela, they called for you earlier- they wanted to catch a movie or hang out at the Newton's place."

Bella stood in horror as she watched her parents transform before her…

Their eyes became darker, pitch black – wicked upturned grins replacing their human features, causing wrinkles on either side of their face.

"Bella, why don't you come inside?"

Bella shook her head violently, backing up until she hit the passenger door of her truck. Throwing herself into the truck, she thrust the key back into the ignition.

"Bella!" they called after her.

_Oh my God, what is happening?_ She ran her trembling hands through her hair as she drove away from Charlie's house...

On the verge of hypervenalation, Bella knew the only place she wanted to go, _needed_ to go- to see if _he_ was there…if _they_ were there…

Home.

The drive was shorter than she remembered it was. The lines of trees on either side swayed as the wind picked up, the sky darkening around her.

Then the brilliant Victorian came into her full view, more polished and beautiful than ever.

In the driveway, was an overly large jeep, a red convertible, a black lexus, a black corolla, and a silver Volvo.

_Edward_ A smile played on her lips. Her heart unconsciously leapt into her throat.

Choking back her tears, Bella slowly parked the car beside the others, still staring open-mouthed at the house. All curtains were drawn, it looked empty.

She didn't have the chance to shut her door-

"Bella!"

Within moments she was being tenderly hugged by her pixie-sister. Bella reciprocated, tears streaming down her face.

"Oh Alice" Bella cried "Is it…really you?" she sniffled, pulling away, still skeptical. Her past encounter with her parents was erased when Alice's face lit up into a smile. "Of course it is me! Come on-" she stepped lithely onto the porch, motioning for Bella to follow. "I could see you coming" she grinned.

Bella tentatively followed Alice into the house. Everything was cast in an unusual shadow. Was it the weather?

"Esme! Carlisle!" Bella rejoiced when she saw their faces. All of her reasoning and skepticism left her when she saw her family standing before her in the living room.

"Welcome home Bella" Carlisle nodded slowly, Esme beaming beside him.

"Hey Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie" Bella nodded, acknowledging them. They all three smiled. Even Rosalie.

_How odd._

"Bella"

The most heavenly of all voices reached her ears. Her eyes fell upon the staircase. A Greek god stood at the top, gripping onto the banister. His topaz orbs were wide, his lips quivering into a smile.

Within a second he had flown down the steps, wrapping his marble arms around her, and enveloped her into him. The feeling of his cold chest against her face caused shivers up her spine.

Confused, Bella continued to hug him tightly, unsure whether she was dreaming. Something was askew – and her sixth sense was making her uneasy.

"Edward?" she questioned still, pulling away.

"Bella, I was so lost without you"

"You're-" Bella stalled "Are you…really…real?"

"Of course I am!" he stretched out his arms. "My God Bella" he wrapped his strong arms protectively about her. "I almost gave up- I didn't know how long I could last without you" he buried his head in her hair. He sniffed her scent before kissing her head. "But then you found me" he stared deep into her chocolate brown eyes.

Tears escaped their barrier. She refused to listen to the warning within her – for so long her heart had ached, she just wanted to be in his arms again.

"Edward, I thought I wouldn't be able to do it" her voice broke with sobs "but, I kept thinking of you"

He smiled crookedly causing her to lose her breath.

"Bella, I can't believe you traveled through hell for me" he looked into her eyes sadly "I'm so sorry-"

"No Edward," she heavily sighed "I couldn't live…not even in heaven, without my heart"

Something flickered across his face, his eyes going black within moments at her words.

Blinking, Bella opened her eyes again to see her Edward.

_What was that?_

"Bella," Edward bent over, his lips caressing the length of her neck. "I've been waiting…so…long…" he breathed heavily onto her neck. "I…need you…"

Bella's arms wrapped around his neck, her body molding into his with a kiss.

Within seconds she was upon his bed, his hands scanning her sides.

"Oh Bella" he moaned when she moved beneath him. His cold hands against her stomach sent shivers up her body. Her head wasn't completely fuzzy or her thoughts incoherent…like when she usually kissed Edward.

"Edward" she called out, holding his face lovingly in her hands._ Maybe this is how the afterlife is supposed to be?_

"I thought…when you left…"

"I left to keep you safe Isabella Swan. But that was my biggest mistake" he nuzzled his nose against her neck and across her collar. _Something's not right…_Bella swallowed hard.

"I love you Edward, so much" she mustered with all the emotion in her heart, finally willing to believe it was him.

His body stiffened beside her, his hands curling into fists.

"Edward?" Bella called out in fear.

His face turned to hers and she gasped.

His face held all the horror of a cast shadow, his eyes pitch black, except for the centers of red. "I was right to leave you" he spoke, furrowing his brow.

"W-what??!" Bella scooted further up on the bed. He held his position, his eyes boring into hers with pure maliciousness.

"Edward-"

"I don't love you Bella…you're not worthy enough for me…"

"No, please Edward-" she backed into the headboard as he drew closer his hands locked hers to her sides. Tears were pouring already.

"You've sunk too far Bella, you can't escape me now" she smiled deviously. Bella's breath hitched-

The momentary growl was followed by intense pressure against her neck that quickly turned to pain. Bella arched her back in her piercing screams-

And then, she couldn't breathe.

Edward's face, his mouth dripping with her blood and gore came into her blurry view. Bella gawked, her body lurched when he withdrew the red-ribboned dagger from her abdomen. Her mind flashed back to the red walls – _the mysterious wound_.

"You're…not…Edward…" she breathed, her widening eyes filling with not terror- but sadness.

The replica before her started backward, his face turning into a smirk "I may not be Edward, but you have lost…there's no way you'll escape now. We have claimed you, and your Edward is gone" were his final words before he was sucked back into the empty swirling space that soon disappeared.

Turning to her side Bella winced, composing her breath. She couldn't contain the waves of pressure from exploding through her chest, the wetness staining her face.

Wanting nothing more than to leave her nightmare, she brought herself up to standing position. Wobbling, still applying pressure to her fatal wound, she stumbled down the stairs and pushed her way out the door into the windy twilight. It was then she remember Lily's words…

_It's called the Plague Upon the Mind, you will see things that are personal to you- people, memories, experiences, and even fears – and everything will be skewed and distorted to make you believed they are your reality. They will trick you to pull you in – don't let them Bella, get away as fast as you can. Because even though you will start to believe that everything around you is real, once you do, your visions can harm you in any way._

Bella drooped her head and squeezed out the tears, trying to breathe.

She had fallen for it…and now she was going to be claimed by this realm, because she was too eager to believe that Edward had ever loved her…that he was waiting for her…when really, she was never worthy…


	12. Falling

_Author's Note: thanks for the reviews, keep reviewing please and I will give u a cupcake!!!_

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_**Falling**_

Her vision was slowly evading her. The smell of her blood that was soaking her shirt and top of her jeans was making her nauseous.

_You're almost there Bella…_the road wavered in front of her.

Pulling over, she climbed from her truck and started into the woods. There was only one place she could find some sort of solace now.

_I can't believe I'm dying_ she chuckled to herself darkly, her delirious state unable to decipher her direction. _I'm in hell, and I'm dying…where will I go_? But that frightening thought hadn't taken over yet.

_I've failed_ the harsh reality hit her harder than any wound. Falling against a tree, her body withered as sobs wracked her form. Holding her stomach, she could still feel the rushing of blood. It wasn't clotting. The wound had gone straight through.

Mournfully hanging her head, her feet trudged on. "I'm so sorry Edward," she sobbed out.

A voice was calling to her in the distance, but she ignored her delusions.

"I'm so so sorry Edward…I wish I could have seen you, I wish I could have told you everything…could have kissed you-"

The last thought put her over the edge, and she stumbled foreword- somehow inches from the clearing. What would have taken hours of aimless wandering, was right before her. But somehow, Bella didn't have the strength anymore…nor the will to move those few feet into the clearing where the sun was finally shining through the silver clouds.

* * *

[Edward's POV 

Edward's ears picked up at the sound of rustling. Jolting to his knees, he watched the dark figure start towards the forest, wobbling and wavering between the trees.

"I'm so sorry"

That gentle, depressed voice, flew into the wind and hit Edward full force.

"Bella?!" he called. He dropped the dagger at his side as he started towards the forest edge.

"I'm so so sorry Edward…I wish I could have seen you, I wish I could have told you everything…could have kissed you-" her voice faltered and strained. He watched, coming closer, as the figure fell to the ground.

Edward raced to the edge.

"Bella!!!" he screamed, pounding against his barrier. "Bella _please_ hear me!!!"

He took in the exhausted figure. His body shook in terror when he saw the blood on the back of her shirt and the depth of the wound.

"BELLA!!!"

The figure of his love lifted her head barely a few inches, before her eyes met his-

"Edward?" she slurred, her eyes watering.

"Bella, oh God- Bella it's me!"

"How…h-how do I know? L-last time…you tried…to kill…me" she muttered groggily, pushing herself from the ground, and getting to her feet unsteadily.

"Be careful-" Edward interrupted "don't stand up too fast, you're hurt" his eyes narrowed in intense worry. "Oh Bella"

Bella seemed moved by his words. "y-you're…"

"Bella, it's me" he stared at her intently with all the love in his heart. Bella's chocolate eyes widened in realization as her gut told her the truth- her breathing quickened as she stared back desperately into his emerald green orbs.

"Edward" she breathed with upturned lips. Her legs started foreword, but her body was too weak to support her. Falling, she could feel arms of marble catch her and hoist her easily into the sunlight, carrying her gently into the field.


	13. Lose You

_**Author's Note:** I really really really want to hear what you all think of this chapter. Hope you enjoy! please review!_

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_**Lose You**_

"Bella, oh Bella" he kissed her supple lips. He could taste the metallic blood upon her mouth, but it did not faze him.

"How did you find me? Where were you? And…" Edward winced as he touched the wound "how did this happen?"

"I…I had to find you…I had to…travel through hell…literally"

Edward's eyebrows narrowed into fury. "Bella, no- you shouldn't have, you should have stayed where you were-"

"Heaven…wasn't heaven…without you…" she gasped. "And…it doesn't matter…that you left me…because…I still love you…"

"Bella, I have always loved you. I only left you to keep you safe, to let you have a chance at a normal human life. But-" tears betrayed him and leaked from the corner of his lids "I couldn't live without you, and when news came of your death, I…I couldn't bear it. I thought I could find you here, in the afterlife-"

"You're a lost soul, Edward" she explained, gently smiling and stroking his face. He held her hand close to his jaw, rubbing it over his cheek. He looked at her quizzically.

Bella's face fell. "You committed suicide…it's not because you're a vampire that you are here…it's because you killed yourself, that you are here…a lost soul…trapped in the last realm…in hell…"

Edward let out a small smile "you really think I could have lived without you?"

Bella's copious tears slowly stopped as she grew lost in his eyes. "I'm…in heaven…now…"

"So am I" he painfully smiled. "But I can't see how you're in heaven when you're…you're in pain and-" Edward wouldn't allow the words to emerge.

Bella sighed. "I wish I didn't…have to go…so…soon…"

"Oh Bella," Edward buried his head into her hair. Bella could feel his body shaking as he held her in the grass, sobs wracking his body and soaking her hair.

"Please" she cried, holding his head in her hands, peering up into his reddened eyes "Please, don't be sad." Tears silently fell down her deathly pale cheeks.

"I don't know where you're going- I can't let you go again" he held her hands against his face.

"You never….lost me Edward" she faintly smiled, her eyes dimming. "You've always had me," and she pulled his hand down, laying it over his chest "in here"

"Bella-"

"No" she cut in "You don't know…how happy…I am…now that…I've found you" her body shuddered against his. Edward then took notice of the blood that was soaking his shirt.

"No, there's got to be a way" his eyes begged to the clouds above him.

"PLEASE TELL ME THERE'S A WAY?!?!" he cried out. But the passing white fluffy clouds only darkened the world around him in reply, as if mocking his misery.

"Edward" she weakly beckoned. Edward cradled her fragile body against his, his green orbs boring into her chocolate brown depths with longing.

"I love you Bella"

"I…love you...Edward" she proclaimed, her head bending up to reach his. He eagerly bent down and took her lips in his- a warming sensation sweeping through his lips into his core. Never before did he feel so alive and revitalized, so complete, so blissfully happy. He kissed without barriers- with fervid earnest- with such intensity he had to remind himself to let Bella breathe. He caressed her sides with his hands, roaming her body, reveling in the feeling of her porcelain skin to his hands. His tears mixed with her own – which only made him kiss her more intensely.

Bella gasped, breaking away from the kiss. "I…wish…I didn't…have to…breathe…"

Edward chuckled, sending her that adorable crooked smile she always loved.

"Oh Edward" she spoke lighter now, touching his face, blushing in embarrasment "there's so many things…I wish…I could have…been able to do…with you…in the afterlife…to have eternity…with you…"

His smoldering gaze made her temporarily lose her words. She knew that he understood her awkwardly-strung sentence. Unexpectedly he kissed her lips full force, without inhibitions. Bella refused to come up for air until he felt her body becoming heavier. She breathed heavily, her eyes flickering open to meet the fervor and passion in his.

"But…I'm content…at least,…to have these few…moments…with you"

"Why?" Edward buried his head into her hair. "Why did you do it? Why couldn't you just turn around when it got too hard?" he cried. Bella gave him a lopsided smile, using all of her remaining energy to lift her upper body up. She wrapped her arms delicately about his stone neck, and he held her steady against his chest as she placed her lips against his neck tenderly, kissing the marble skin. Her body rejoiced in the euphoria of touching Edward's skin. Edward moaned in delight, and brought her back from her ministrations with his own lips. His scent was so strong, it washed over and paralyzed her senses until she felt completely whole- welded into his body – her mind completely lost in his touch. She painfully wondered what being closer with him would have been like…if she had had the chance…

"I never wanted…to let you down Edward" she finally answered, drawing away in a rattling breath.

Her body commenced to collapse within his arms. He could feel her own soul start to lift…but where would she go? Weren't they in the afterlife? Weren't they in heaven together now?

"Please Bella, don't go" Edward cried softly, kissing her forehead tenderly. He buried himself in her hair, cradling her back and forth in his strong arms. His entire body shook in distress, consumed by the agonizing torment of Bella's imminent departure.

"Bella?"

"Edward…" she called like a child. Edward winced at the sound, there was too much fear in her voice that he couldn't relieve. "I don't want to go Edward, I'm going to lose you again…"

"I've always loved you Bella, don't you forget that"

Bella's eyes flickered. "And…I've always loved you, Edward…you have…my heart,…take care of it..."

"No, Bella no!!!"

Suddenly a small girl appeared, about 8 or 9 years old, with blonde hair, blue eyes, and a somber expression.

"She's leaving Edward"

"LEAVING WHERE?" He cried, still clutching to her body. "WHERE IS SHE GOING??"

"Edward, I'm sorry- she sacrificed her soul for you – no one has ever traveled through hell without a consequence...no one has ever traveled this far _before_..." Lily stared off in disbelief, her face completely blank "and now she must suffer the consequences."

Lily bowed her head. Edward could only imagine the insufferable amount of pain Bella had endured...all to see him, before she too was lost...

"No, I won't be alone again- I'd rather be gone than trapped here without her." He spoke mostly to himself, still looking into Bella's eyes.

He lowered his face, kissing Bella's pallid, weak lips passionately, tears falling ever so lightly upon her skin.

"I love you Bella" he whispered into her ear, his wet eyelashes brushing her skin. Bella opened her mouth, her voice coming out in a hoarse whisper "I love you too…Edward"

"Edward, what are you-" Lily charged foreword when she saw the dagger, that had been so fatally placed beside him.

Edward's eyes held no pain, only slight shock. He withdrew the knife from its home instantly, letting the blood flow freely. He looked at himself curiously, wondering how his stone cold hands and strength was able to penetrate himself that successfully. He turned to Bella with a slight smile, already feeling the life flow from him quickly.

He smiled to the young child before him, his eyes glowing with certain happiness.

"It's okay Bella, I'm coming with you" he stroked her cheek, tears falling relentlessly. He laid her down beside him, pulling her close and wrapping his arm protectively about her, the red ribboned dagger positioned beneath them. He could feel the faint, slowing beating of her heart. She nudged her nose against his, molding her shape into him.

He felt the life draining fast out of her, and he knew he was soon to follow.

Where their souls would end up, he did not know…

"Edward" Lily rushed towards him.

In his haze, he could see her smile.

He began to fade fast as the loss of life within hit him hard. He lay back down, his eyes locked on Bella's still, barely breathing form. _I'm right here Bella_…he closed his eyes, his last vision of her face. If their souls should perish, to be lost and destroyed…then he would be content with that end…as long as Bella was beside him…

_Remember Edward, do not believe Rosalie…_ Lily's voice echoed in the distance as he drifted off…


	14. Recited

_**Author's Note:** I'll try and post another chapter tomorrow and probably this weekend- have a writers block. But, just so you know... the next chapter will probably be the last, and then I'm making a sequel (which will deal with everything revealed in the next chapter). Hope you enjoy this one!!_

_Please Review!!! XOXO_**_

* * *

_**

**_Recited_**

Bella was falling…falling foreword and tumbling wildly in the air, spinning faster and faster until-

Icy cold enveloped her and sunk into her skin. She was stalled temporarily, suspended within the enveloping iciness, her arms raised above her.

_Swim Bella, swim!!!_

_Edward_…

_You have to try Bella, try for me- I can't lose you again…_

Bella's eyes shot open in the dark swirling waters before her, her breath still tightly caught in her throat. The torrent currents began to toss her body.

Images scattered together in her mind. Was it all a dream?

But before she could even attempt to swim again, her body was thrown up against the jagged rock behind her- all air forced from her lungs and floating to the surface. Horror filled her being as horrors of her travel through hell.

Her hands clasped onto the jagged rocks behind her that had pierced her skin. Despite the scrapping of her skin against the barnacles, she took all of her strength to stabilize herself against the rocks.

_C'mon Bella!_

The slamming currents rammed her body into the boulder above her harshly – her head contacting hard, and her body slamming into her wrist awkwardly. White splatters flashed before her eyes. Her lingering hand loosened around her support, her other hand feebly reaching up, feeling the break between her fingertips.

_Don't open your mouth Bella, keep it shut-_

Her aching head throbbed unmercifully- her hand still stretching above the torrent waves.

Just when a crushing wave passed over her, and Bella could no longer hear his voice…her body was being lifted to the surface by hot hands.

"Bella!! Bella can you hear me?" he smacked her cheeks gently.

The pressure on her chest was awfully uncomfortable.

Her lungs rushed and purged out the salty water, her eyes bursting open into the sunlight- into Jacob Black's face.

"Jacob" she smiled, letting her head fall back to the ground. "Ow" she muttered, holding her head. Her hands and head stung badly – she knew it was the salt.

"Hold on Bella, just stay still- we'll get you to the hospital soon"

"She's so cold!" another deep voice commented from behind.

"Go get Billy's truck ready" Jacob ordered in worry.

Bella let her body succumb exhaustion…_she wouldn't have to face hell again…_

* * *

He was lying on his back in a forest…how he got there, he did not know. He searched through his head, knowing he had completely forgotten a time gap between searching for Victoria in the forest, and decided to break- to lie on the green grass and think. But he couldn't remember what he was just thinking about.

Sitting upright, his pocket began to vibrate.

"Hello?"

"Edward" Rosalie's shaky voice came on the other end "Edward, something's happened"

The voice of a child rang in his ears _whatever you do, don't believe Rosalie…_

"Edward, Bella's dead"

Edward's eyes were wide. Images and scenes beyond his control were sucking him in so fast, he couldn't comprehend their meaning…the meadow…the girl…Bella in his arms…a nightmare he had actually lived.

Edward's chest fell and rose sharply. "No…she's not…" his voice choked.

"Edward, she fell from a cliff, I'm so sorry-"

"No Rosalie, check with Alice then call me back" Edward interrupted, snapping the phone shut.

Without a moment to spare, he was sprinting from Alaska to Forks.

* * *

She could hear the monitor beeping in even, slow high pitched beats beside her. There was something in her nose that was pushing air into her lungs.

Her world was completely hazy, a mix of blinding white and red plastic bags.

Coolness enveloped her hand, and her body shuddered into calm. Lazily she hung her head to the side, flickering open her eyes. She couldn't seem to adjust her vision- all she could see was the brilliant gold in front of her.

"Edward?" her voice rasped, damaged by the chill of the water.

"I'm here," he squeezed her hand tenderly, his eyes full of concern.

Without warning, tears were spilling from her eyes.

"Sh…" Edward was instantly upon the bed, enveloping her pale form. She reached up shakily and ran her hand through his hair, tracing the outline of his jaw.

"I'm never leaving you again Bella"

Bella jolted her head to his eyes at his words. He gave her such a hard, blazing stare she temporarily lost her breath.

"But-"

"Did I tell you nothing?" he smirked, but there was a hint of sadness in his eyes "I've always loved you Bella, don't you forget that" he stared earnestly into her big chocolate eyes now pooling with tears.

Instantly after he recited those fatal, precious words- Bella collapsed into sobs within his arms.

"I knew it" she sobbed, clutching to his shirt. "I knew it was all real…"

"I could never have left you, Bella. You're my heart, my soul- all that I am." He lifted her chin with his single finger, kissing the tears from her eyes and savoring the taste.

"I love you Edward"

"I know…" he chuckled. "But not as much as I love you-"

"Doubtful!" she hoarsely shouted. "I traveled through hell to get to you" she smirked, proving herself. Edward instantly narrowed his eyebrows, regret filling his facial features.

"I'm so sorry Bella…I couldn't live without you…" he wrapped his arms around her frail human body, drawing it into his chest.

Bella cocked her head "By the way, where were you all that time?"

Edward's lips twitched "hunting"

"Hunting? The _entire_ time?"

"Well…for Victoria. I was trying to test my tracking skills-"

"V-Victoria?! W-what?!"

"We'll…talk about it later" he edged, grimacing. He drew her closer, kissing the top of her head. "The human needs her rest"

"But what if I don't want to sleep?" Bella yawned. Edward chuckled.

"Well then," Edward turned her face towards him. "what would you like to do?"

Bella's eyes brightened, a deep crimson flush coming to her cheeks.

Edward smiled crookedly, and willingly bent his head foreword to catch her lips. Bella's hands ran through his hair, her body molding into his perfect-sculpted form. Only seconds later, did Edward's lips stiffen into a smile as he slowly lifted her off of him.

"Don't…leave…" she breathed, not yet opening her eyes. "Please…don't leave…me"

Edward frowned "Bella, I'm never leaving you again. I'm way too selfish…to suffer or to cause you pain again…"

"Promise?" Bella choked.

Edward sighed. "What do I have to do to convince you that I'm never going to leave you?" he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Prove it" Bella's eyes narrowed dangerously into a smoldering, fiery glare. She watched Edward's face blaze in response, his lips pushing upon hers dangerously until she was lying on her bed, his body looming very closely over hers, his hands on either side of her body. Instantly her mind flashed to the meadow…it felt too similar- reckless, needful, full of passion, lust, love…she could get used to this.

It was Edward who had to break away this time, breathing heavily – even though he needn't to. He looked down at her flabbergasted.

"When did you learn to kiss like that?" he muttered, smiling crookedly.

Bella was still trying to catch her breath. "I…one minute…"

Edward let out a booming laugh. "That was…amazing" he marveled to himself, eyes filled with wonder as his stared off, messing with the back of his hair.

"Well, Edward Cullen, you're not the only one with skills" Bella grinned. Edward smirked in response, lowering himself beside her and wrapping his arms around her back. He nuzzled his nose against her neck, and Bella let out a small moan.

"W-when…I wake…can we, practice…kissing, some more?"

She felt him chuckled behind her. He leaned to her ear, sending chills down her body at his warm whispers. "I'm not sure I can do just kissing…"

Bella knew if Edward could blush, he would be at that moment.

"I think…I can manage with that" Bella brought Edward's hand up to her mouth, kissing it tenderly. Edward groaned. "Your warmth…feels so good…"

Bella snuggled deep into him, before her body unwillingly fell into slumber.


	15. Taking Chances

_Author's_ _Note: This is the last chapter of "What If"...it's supposed to lead into my new story, "Taking Chances". Hope you like, please review!!!_

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**_Taking Chances_**

Edward had made sure that when Charlie came into the hospital room, he was sitting in the chair at the end of the bed. Charlie sent him glares as he roughly passed him and sat in the empty chair beside his daughter's bed. Edward temporarily would leave the room to give him time with Bella, despite her pleading stares.

Within a day, she was allowed to leave the hospital (after much complaining, despite Edward's aggravating attempts to make her stay longer). Although Charlie was glowering, he reluctantly allowed Edward to help carry and situate Bella to her bedroom.

"Edward" Charlie gruffly mumbled "could I have a word downstairs with you?"

Edward nodded "Sure Chief Swan."

Charlie let his eyes linger from Edward to Bella before charging down the steps slowly.

Edward turned back to Bella with a crooked smile.

"I'm sorry Edward" Bella bit her lower lip. _I can only imagine how bad Charlie is going to chew him out…_

"Don't worry." Edward tapped his head before sitting down beside her on the bed. He looked her over. "You're a sore sight"

Bella frowned, lightly punching him in the shoulder- although it was a faint attempt to hurt a marble statue. She immediately regretted her actions, and doubled over, holding onto her wrapped wrist. Cool hands wrapped around her center, cooling the stifling itchy hotness of the bandages around her newly un-broken ribs.

Edward shook his head as he looked into her eyes. "What am I going to do with you Bella Swan?"

"What?!" Bella cried out indignantly.

Edward smirked. "Three fracture ribs, a sprained wrist, a concussion and almost fractured skull, hypothermia, scraped skin on your hands and bruises on your legs- and you're asking 'what?'"

"I don't even remember it being so cold, or the broken ribs, or the broken wrist." Bella blinked her eyes looking past Edward, lost in shock.

Edward's smile faded as he brought Bella's face back to his own. Tentatively he brought his lips to hers…and now he knew, with all the joy swelling in his heart, that this was better than heaven…

Bella wrapped her injured wrist and hands around his neck, letting him lower her onto the bed in his sweet, tantalizing kisses skimming across her jaw and neck. Her breath was practically in gasps when his hands started to massage the sides of her body-

"Charlie" he whispered into the kiss, before whispering in her ear "I'll be right back"

Bella, still breathing heavily, nodded her head deliriously with unopened eyes. When she felt his presence leave, her entire body collapsed into pants, her arms stretching out over the bed.

_Why is he doing this? Usually he's so…cautious…_

Bella could hear them talking below…mostly it was Charlie ranting and raving to Edward about something. Bella cringed. She didn't want to deal with this at the moment.

After what seemed hours, when it was only five minutes, she heard the faint creak of her window, and instantly two icy hands were around her.

"I hope he didn't give you too hard a time" Bella asked with worried eyes.

"No" Edward's face fell "he did make me feel guilty for leaving…of which I should be. He knows that you want me around…but he's just having a hard time accepting that. He's afraid…" Edward's words trailed off.

"That you'll leave again" Bella finished.

"Which will never happen" Edward cooed in her ears. Bella shivered when he wrapped his hand over her stomach, massaging it gently. A low growl emitted from deep within his throat. Bella pushed her body up against his, her lips tracing the contours of his neck. Soon she let her head slip into the comfort of his shoulder.

"Why are you doing this?" she whispered, mystified. There was a long moment of silence, when both were reveling in the other's embrace.

"I've realized how precious time is…especially with you…I can't take these moments for granted anymore…"

Bella looked up into Edward's eyes in amazement, captured by the truth in those topaz orbs.

"Bella," he gently brushed back a strand of hair behind her ear "It was silly of me to think that I could save you from me…when in reality, you are the one that has saved me"

Bella cocked her head quizzically. "Edward, you're not making any sense"

Edward smiled "Before you, my life was a blur- I never knew what I was missing, until I met you. You held me captive at first scent- but in reality, I have never felt this much…_feeling_…for someone, in all my century…and I have passed millions of people, during my lifetime…never before have I felt so strongly, so _passionately_ for someone- so…_much_ for someone before." He narrowed his eyebrows "it's like…I can't breathe when you're not around – I suffocate even though I don't need air…my world isn't right until I hold you in my arms again."

Tears were streaming down Bella's face at his words. _He can't possibly be talking about me…this is how __**I**__ feel about him…_

"That's why I don't want to take for granted any time we may have together, I want to take chances" he kissed right below her earlobe, sending Bella's blood rushing to her head.

Edward stiffened for a moment, before relaxing his head and embracing her closer. He let his lips linger around her ear, "I don't want to miss experiencing things with you…"

At his words, Bella's breath was caught in her throat. _Is he really saying this?_

Bella jerked her head quickly around. "Edward- are you agreeing-"

"On conditions" he held up a finger, a smile twitching on his lips.

He took her hands in his, his eyes locking with hers. His topaz stare started to reveal a hint of emerald green in them as he looked up sheepishly, his hands gently massaging the tops of hers.

"Bella, I know this may not be exactly the right time…but would you be my wife?"

Bella's mouth hit the floor, her eyes staring into his awaiting expression. _M-married_?

One thought instantly came into her mind "C-Charlie" she stuttered. Edward's eyes narrowed.

"Are you afraid of his reaction?"

"Yes- no-yes" Bella sighed, shaking her head "Yes. But…married? I'm…I'm only 18-"

Edward nodded "I know Bella, this is a big leap, but" he looked earnestly into her eyes "I've never been so sure of anything in my life. I love you, Bella Swan"

"And I love you too, Edward Cullen" she instantly blurted out in response. It was innate, how she was able to profess her love for Edward_- but then why is this so hard?_

"Edward- please don't think I don't want to marry you, I do! I just…always thought I would be …_older_…when I got married…"

"I can always wait-"

"_**No**_!" Bella shouted, instantly regretting her words before. "I don't want you to wait Edward! If you're staying in your teens forever, so am I! I'm just…" she turned her head away in embarrassment.

"Hey," Edward turned her face to his "I know you're parents were young when they got married, but we're not like them" he reminded her. And for a moment, under his hypnotizing stare, Bella completely forgot everything and nodded in response.

Edward realized what he was doing to Bella, and instantly pulled away, letting Bella blink back into consciousness. _Wooh_ her head was fuzzy.

Bella looked up at her Edward. He looked so…depressed…he was looking away at the bed, his shoulders hunched.

Bella held her breath. Edward's head jolted upright at the sound. Closing her eyelids, she could finally compose herself before she looked back into his eyes.

"Yes, Edward Cullen," easier than she thought, the words flowed out of her "With all my heart, I want to marry you- I want to be your wife" tears leaked from the corners.

Edward's face lit up into a radiant smile- wider than she had ever seen. His entire being was so brilliantly radiant and exuberant, he was more elated than he had ever seen him in her entire year of knowing him…of _loving_ him…

Without warning she was under the control of his captivating lips and his invigorating scent permeated and paralyzed her senses till she was on overload. She was drunk – high- completely intoxicated by the scent of his breath, and the feel of his lips. Her head was on the pillow, his hands roaming her sides roughly. She accidentally brought one of her legs up in the moment of her gasping moan as he kissed her neck-

Edward's entire body froze, and Bella opened her eyes. Gulping.

Her knee had positioned itself strategically between Edward's thighs-

Edward was staring at her with wide, almost fearful, eyes. _If he could only blush_…she thought, realizing her own cheeks were flushed completely crimson.

"B-Bella" he closed his eyes, tightly, concentrating on something hard. Bella was too afraid to withdraw her leg, and instead with a cupped mouth, watched her love slowly panting above her.

"I'm so sorry Edward, I didn't-"

"Sh…" Edward's finger came to her mouth. He was once again flush against her body, his eyes smoldering in a fiery gaze. He bent down to her ear "you're going to pay for that later"

Bella could barely breathe as he lowered himself down beside her.

"You don't know what you do to me, Bella Swan" he snuggled his head beside hers, breathing in her scent. Bella arched her head back. "And you…have no…idea…what you…do…to me"

Edward chuckled. Eventually they began to drift into a comfortable silence, Bella's mind wandering in her thoughts.

"Edward," she softly called out, pulling him out of his reverie. She narrowed her eyes "what is an…electa una?"

She could feel him stiffen behind her.

"Edward?" she turned her head in alarm.

His eyes were darker, his lips pressed in a thin line. "Where did you hear that?"

"From Lily"

Edward only stared.

"My guide?"

He still did not understand, but nodded anyway. "What did she say?"

"She said…I was one."

Edward jolted upright and Bella followed instantly.

"Edward?"

"I think we need to visit Carlisle"

"Now?" Bella looked up in distress, her eyes drooping. Edward chuckled, but there was an edge to it.

"No, love, in the morning." he snuggled back into place, and Bella purred, resuming her place in the deep contours of his body.

"I love you" Edward whispered into her ear before she finally slipped into her heaven...sleeping, there, in Edward's arms.


End file.
